Sunday, June 15, 2008

please stop marrying.

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brad and jenn




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jessica and nick

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K Fed and Britney

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Kid and Pam

ya'll gotta stop marrying, unless you know that you ain't gonna break up after 2 years. it is irritating for eyes to watch and disturbing. Do you agree with me? Everytime some celebrity get together to get married, they divorce a year or even a month later even we commoners can predict. It is quite fun to predict sometime. Let's analyse why and how these break up happens.


Bad interpersonal communication- duh.
Dysfunctional patterns
-Rigid role relations (dominance,distributing power within the relationship)
-disconfirmations (rejecting responses,responses that leaves us with a diminished sense of self-respect)
-paradoxes (sending once another contradictory messages,double messages)
-spirals (one partner's behaviour intensifiesthat of the other -progressive spirals,regressive spirals, interpersonal self fulfilling prophecy)



Stages in coming apart- THE RETREAT FROM INTAMACY
Knapp's relational development model
1)Differentiating-a couple begans to notice and comment on previously overlooked differences.
2)Circumscribing-couple carefully restrict their communication. certain topics are placed off limits because they are too painful.
3)Stagnating-characterized by silence and inactivity.communication is infrequent,and when it does occurs,it is stylized,rigid and awkward,as though the partners were strangers.
4)Avoiding-partners seperate either physically or emotionally. In this case, in a marriage, a spouse may spend more times at the office or visit relatives for the summer. Or even behaving as though the other don't exist.
5)Terminating-If both parties are aware that their relationship is dissolving,termination may come as a relief. - relationship is over.


So now you know. I'm not sure what happened to each of those couple who divorced but im sure that the dysfunctional patterns and stage of reetreating from intamacy was in play. lets wait and see nick cannon and mariah's marriage:DD


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5 comments:

mynameishafiz. said...

yup so now i know! haha, but its quite sad that it ends that fast i mean maybe 8-9 years would be a more "acceptable" time frame to then divorce, a few months or years is just too fast.

Anonymous said...

you can see that this trend is happening in singapore also, broken families and stuff. its even worst if they have kids, the kids are the ones who suffer.what is the world coming toooo!?

Anonymous said...

nick cannon and mariah carey is gonna break up damn soon. it so predictable. i mean, where did this mariah and nick come about or come from?! its like that in hollywood, celebrities sometimes get too bored in their life and have everything in their life so they want to spice things up:getting married.

Anonymous said...

i guess it is because the way westerners are,laidback and all, some who traditional but most who are not, and they take marriage like a game instead of being serious. and when they don't take it very seriously they find that after getting married, these stages from kapp's model start acting and patterns of dysfunction start kicking in.

Anonymous said...

yes please stop marrying, its sucks to see them break up! especially brad and jenn! they look so good together! wow, i didn't there's a whole model on breaking up.